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Photo By Cindy Sherman
I had a doctor appointment yesterday. It wasn't anything big, just to see if she needed to up my dose of Effexor. After that was discussed she was asking about my thyroid. For once I could tell her that I have been very good about taking it and such. She had me hop up on the table and felt my glands and asked me to swallow and then told me that I have a nodule on my thyroid. I wasn't really surprised and I was a little shocked that I didn't even shed a tear in her office. She explained that it is something that needs to be checked out and asked if I would be getting insurance any time soon. I need to have an ultra-sound done and maybe a needle biopsy if the ultrasound is questionable. She explained that most lumps or nodules are benign. There is only a 10 percent chance that it is cancer. If it is a cyst and it isn't large enough that it is causing problems with breathing or swallowing it will be left alone. (I have been having weird sporadic sore throat issues going on for the past 3 weeks.) We decided to not do anything right now since she didn't see the urgency because growths on the thyroid are slow moving and majority of the time not cancerous. So now I have to go back to the doctor August 23. I am going to try to see if I can't get on a government insurance program before I go back just in case it is cancer or I need surgery or treatments. I think I am more angry then worried at this point. Angry that I seem to constantly have this black cloud hanging over my head. The other day while I was washing dishes I made a mental note to myself to really enjoy the day because it had been a while since I had no medical diagnosis pending and that I was feeling healthy. Even the concern that my doctor brought up about me possibly being diabetic has subsided because I have been eating healthier and have been more in control of my binging etc. (keeping binges down to a minimum and binging on vegetables.) Today I feel like I am falling apart. I cried about it for the first time at work today when I was asked about how my weekend went. I guess what my main concern is insurance and lack there of. Worse case scenario I could always go to cook county hospital. I plan on looking into Ichip again (insurance by the government provided for those who are uninsurable.) Maybe there is an association providing insurance for cosmetologists?
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