Manic ...
Thursday
February 17, 2005

1.  Did I mention that I spent like 300 dollar when I was off at Hobby Lobby while I was off with my surgery.  Yep.. I wheeled around in the wheelchair and R followed me trying to rapidly catch all the stuff I threw at him or the cart.  I often have shopping sprees where I decide before I go that I will buy whatever my little heart desires.  Anyone think I'm MANIC? yet again.  

2.  Lately every time I sleep at R's I notice that I have been sweating a lot.  He has Red flannel sheets and I am wondering if maybe that is the culprit, I don't know, but R sometimes sweats a lot in his sleep when he is physically having a bad night (as often he does)  R jokes around that I am turning into him.  .. yikes!

3.  I went to a book signing tonight.  It was really cool, I have never been to one before and it was extra special because the authors of the book are actually two of my clients.  It's odd sometimes when you see your clients outside of the salon.. I think it's because often Hairdressers know their clients pretty well, especially if they have the clientele for a while.  The Panic Diaries is the name of their book, it's really a great book not only does it offer information and advice on different ways to get a handle on panic attacks but it also gives it's history and talks about what a lot of people suffer from and nobody talks about with lighthearted wit. 

4. I have been really getting into the HBO movie series Carnivale.  if you have the chance check it out!

 

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I think the question isn't why can't I stop eating.. it's more .. why do I want to hurt myself?   Why do I think I am unworthy.. of anything, happiness, love and being loved, peace of mind, a happy ending.